Saturday, December 27, 2008

Respect

Just finished seeing "Revolutionary Road' -the movie, based on the classic novel by Richard Yates. It is a realistic account of a couple who thought of themselves as different, intellectual, hipper, more alive when they were single and in love. Then comes marriage and daily existence — his job, her motherhood. Both are individualistic, stubborn yet loving and caring. What continues sounds like a common predicament - daily blows to the ego, which eventually......... you'll have to read the book or see the movie. This movie somehow inspired me to write this -

Respect the traffic constable for he stands amid the heavy traffic in the blazing sun

Respect the pedestrian for he/she needs space just like every other vehicle on road

Respect the waiter for he works continuously

Respect the aged for their age

Respect the kids for their craziness and imagination

Respect your friends for their love

Respect your colleagues for their help

Respect thy neighbours if they respect you

Respect the man like an individual

Respect the woman like an individual


Respect the individual for his/her individuality


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Monday, December 15, 2008

Quote UnQuote

An easy, lazy way to revive any blog - write one liners. That is precisely what I'm going to do right now. And right now i'm having a hallucinated premonition that these quotes are published in the third page of Reader's Digest:-)...But I should confess these random quotes are truly mine. No pretentious philosophical stuff... just random honest things that i realised during the course of my life... till now. Five years from now I might even laugh at them... saying how immature they are... But right now i think they are true.

There will be NO WAR between nations...between neighbouring countries...if you can leave your car right in front of your house WITH the keys in it.

Love lasts longer only if you take the effort

Luxury is no more a luxury after you get it

Global warming will solve every problem between men and women… every problem will come to an end ….when the earth sinks.. And Mars & Venus will live happily ever after.

The male organ of copulation in higher vertebrates can travel deep but can never touch the heart

Where do they make machines that in turn make machines that make products?

I agree with Murphy’s law… now will Murphy prove me wrong.

'Forecasting' has another name - confidence

The most interesting thing about the future is future itself - we have no clue what's going to happen.

God invented clothes. He didn't quite like what he created.

It's naturally obvious that family comes first.

Believe in yourself. Believe in what's in between you and your friend. Just believe.

Monday is the day people postpone their work to Tuesday.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Classroom Orgasm!!!


Another old article of mine. Thanks to my friend 'Ryan' , it got published in a magazine called 'The Man'

An Orgasm as described by the Oxford is the climax of sexual excitement, characterized by intensely pleasurable sensations centred in the genitals. History would say it’s the raison d'ĂȘtre of a sex obsessed crazy male species. Whatever the case may be, men strive to reach the K2 level of sexual peaks in their bedroom and fantasize about it when they are not in the bedroom...as many times as they can before they die. Almost not a second is wasted. Orgasm is essentially a powerful energy expulsion where all the energy is steered towards just one thing - coitus!

Now imagine... just imagine...

What if the orgasm happened between the ears? Literally. What if we got orgasms by reading. Not by reading erotica. Just by reading. Every page and every chapter will be a stage towards the climax. The better the book, the more interesting it is, the more informed and cognizant it is, the longer and better will be your orgasm. Knowledge and intelligence would become sinfully exciting. Intellectual masturbation would actually make sense. Men would start faking it more than women. Or boys will outperform girls in higher secondary examinations. Classrooms in schools and colleges would be moaning in chorus with 'mmmmhs' and 'aaaaaaaahs'. And Viagra would be prescribed for men with erectile dysfunction. Book reviews will be rated on the longevity and calibre of each orgasm. You'll get reviews like 'sure-shot multiple orgasms' instead of the usual 'international bestseller'. Book critics would be having a gala time. Pulitzer prize winners and quizmasters would be the horniest buggers. Neuroscientists will be having a ball. News readers will have the most difficult time maintaining their composure. And you would’ve been on your way to an orgasm even as you read this.

Sounds crazy doesn't it? But imagine a potent energy like orgasm directed towards something useful. We would have had a developed world of the year 2098 by today. Flying cars, space travel, average life expectancy of 120+...and the like. The entire civilization would be full of whiz kids and prodigies. The elderly would be even more intelligent and wiser than anyone can imagine. There would be considerably lesser number of rapes and molestations. Women would finally be free from debauchers. Men would be busy burglarizing book stores.

But why didn't the God almighty think of this. He definitely could have if I could have. Then why did he make men oscillate towards the tempting forbidden zone called ‘sex’ with a bait called orgasm. May be he was afraid that the human race would become more intelligent than he was and may be even realize immortality.

Since everything is relative…so in relation to life - may be life wouldn't have been as interesting as it is now if the case was otherwise. Orgasm is a wonderful thing. And so is life. Life is too wonderful an adventure with loads of other gifted feelings and relationships. Too wonderful to be changed from what it is now.

To put it in simple words, ‘Life is the longest orgasm anyone can have.'

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Mother's Day

An old article that I wrote in another blog. Just posting it here again.
‘Mother’s Day’ – ever noticed the unintentional pun? It is Mother’s day every day. The day belongs to her. The mere existence of the human race and the passage of time belong to her. But it’s a poignant irony that we’ve reduced it to a mere anniversary celebration. We are pretty much aware of the fact that it is a marketer’s invention. But still things go on. Special programmes on TV. Greeting cards. Ads. And lots more to remind us of somebody we know as the “mother”. Today's generation think that it’s another day to celebrate. It’s not their fault for their life began much after the media explosion. But no amount of media clout can monitor the level of the mother’s love inside everybody’s home. The so-called reality shows can just come inside our home bur not inside our heart.
Motherhood love. It’s universal. It’s chemical. It’s biological. It’s transcendental. It’s magic. It's everything, sssooo obviously. This motherhood love is also contagious that it is in every one of us. Sometimes the father mothers the child. Sometimes the brother takes care of the sister. She has genetically transferred the GOOD DNA. And this good dna is also helping mother earth stay alive.
Ok, lets play devil’s advocate - the hungry marketers might have actually done something good without their knowledge. With so much grief and combat around the planet, may be we need a break and actually commit to our memory that there’s somebody called the 'mother'. Today’s world needs such a reminder service. To take timeout form our demented work schedules. To actually come out of our perfunctory life and spend some time with our family.
So Happy Mother’s Day. 365 days a year.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Memories. Not Forever.


Photographs. Home videos. What splendid inventions. Man found a way to capture time and space in 2D and 3D what God initially thought could be stored only in their minds. From the good old pinhole camera days, ten centuries ago to the present digital age, we have been fortunate enough to store our memories and see them whenever we want to.
The only problem now is organising our photos. There are photos and videos in our digital camera, mobile and the camcorder. Too many photos in too many folders. Too many wires to charge the devices and too many USB cables to connect it to our computers. Assuming that we have managed to organise everything... lets say, we store them properly as prints and CDs/DVDs. In hard bound albums and leather cd pouches. Now the million dollar question - how long can we have them? As long as we live. So what happens after that? Our next generation will hopefully preserve it and see it whenever they want to(and hopefully remember us). How long can this go? Do you think our great great great great grand children will treasure it too? How many photos of our great great great grand parents do we have? How much time do we spend talking about them? Once my cousin and myself took the effort of collecting old photos of our grandparents, scanning them and hosting a website. Imagine. We are a family of 40 in my mother's side. Only two had the interest. Imagine if I die tomorrow, I'll have no idea what will happen to the photos after that. Or lets say, I die a natural death at 80 something( Murphy has to prove it wrong, so I'll live longer:-)) what will happen to the photos after that? I'll never know. Or imagine there was a tsunami and the flood swept away all my photos and videos. (that is little over the top or me being my paranoid self). Ok, what Iam trying to say is that technically memories cant last forever. They last only as long as we live.
But photographs and videos are a wonderful thing. I want to collect it as much as I can and relish it on a rainy day or whenever I can. No matter when I die, I'll be happy that I have captured these moments that mean so much to me. By that way, somehow i get this feeling that Iam living life to the fullest.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

MENopoly

I hate monopoly. I hate the word. Except for the board-game with the same name, I hate everything about it. The Monopolistic and Restrictive Trade Practices Act in India represents abuse of market power in the production and marketing of goods and services by eliminating potential competitors from the market. It's about taking unfair advantage and control over the market by superior guerrilla marketing tactics or by charging unreasonably high or low prices and preventing competition in the same field.

For example take the ipod. 'Creative' was one of the first companies to produce MP3 players but has lost out to Apple which dominates the market. I hate it. I agree it's got a brilliant design. It's a good product. All other mp3 players are technically good or even better than the ipod. Ipod doesn't even have a FM radio. But somehow it has managed to magnetize the world. Apple fanatics might disagree. This outcry from one in a billion blogs cant change a thing. Which is precisely my point. Monopolist corporates and individuals are extant parasites. Nothing can be done. The customer might be the 'King' but corporates still rule the planet. They even decide how our environment should be.

The probability of you reading this on a PC which runs on a windows operated system is 8 out of 10. Microsoft is another giant that secretly allowed counterfeiting of its own software, so that everyone uses it. We don't know any other operating system or any other way our computers could work. Here, I would like to thank Apple for their rebellious marketing effort. The list goes on. Coke. Pepsi. P&G. Unilever. USA(at least for the time being). etc. Mammoth wolfs in sheep's clothes.

But I'm not here to talk about them. I'm here to talk about someone else of a similar nature. He's the most perceptible Monopolistic Monster of them all. Yea, it's a 'he'. The Man. The male species. The person who belongs to the sex that cannot have babies. From time immemorial, 'he' has ruled the world. Men framed the law. History was written by winners, mostly men. Theories, philosophies, stories were mostly written by men.So if they wrote Adam came first and then came eve, then Adam came first - for that's how it was written. It was always the evolution of Man because a man wrote it. Knowledge is knowledge as we know it. In other words we know it the way it was written by men.


So you might think whether I'm still caught in a time wrap. I agree that women have excelled in every field. It's good thing that the line is also becoming a cliche. Women have been accepted as equal partners and men have let them do whatever they want... to an extent. Unfortunately, we, the so called new gen people think of all these in a closed air-conditioned room. We only see what we want to see, living in metros or big cities. The rest of India or the rest of the world(sans the metros) is where the major population lives.Did you know that 75% of the people who live in Bombay live below the poverty level. Try looking there and you will see the real world. We are still fighting for 33% reservation for women in our parliament. Sexual Harassment, abuse, rape, abortion, infanticide, foeticide, son preference still exist. If things have evolved, we wont be needing 'Women's day' in the first place. It's still a man's day 364 days a year.

Men have to travel a lot... in their mind. Perceptions have to change at an individual level. Not just men from villages and small towns. There are such guys everywhere. Women should also not let men take advantage. It's easy for me to write these things. They should do this. They should do that. People should think like this. I know I cant do a thing unless I have a wireless remote control to all their minds. I'm just airing my views here. To me, it's not just Men Vs Women. It's A vs B. Or X Vs Z. One cannot overpower the other. I hate monopoly. I hate monopoly. But unfortunately, my world-views end with me.

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